In Memoriam

  In Memory of Gurcharanjit Singh s/o Dewan Singh (PBM) (BBM) 4 February 1969 – 3 October 2010 

The weekend of 3 October 2010 was a day when our family realised the true meaning of the phrase “Beyond our Control”. The passing of Gurcharanjit or Gur as he was affectionately known came as a shock leaving no time for us to say our final goodbyes.    
Always calm, collected and composed with an ever ready smile, Gur was a passionate and dedicated person. He was dedicated to his profession, his family and to the community. Being the eldest of three boys, he always had a strong distinction of right and wrong and the realisation of responsibility to family and the community from a very early age, after the passing of his father.         
Called to the Bar in March 1998, Gur was a man of high morals and ethics. Members of the Bench and Bar describe him as the epitome of the gentleman lawyer, a kind and good person, a tough negotiator, always pressing his client’s case firmly but displaying the utmost respect and integrity towards fellow members of the Bar.   
One member and close friend described him as a “BIG Man with a BIG Heart”. “He was always eager to share his ideas and plans and dispensed words of advice to me. He was not one to hold any punches. He was always frank, forthright and true to his beliefs. His presence was always felt when he was around and he invariably left his mark in everything he embarked on.” This was apparent when many from all walks of life came to say their good byes to him and shared what he had done for them not only professionally but also in his private capacity and as a respected grassroots leader. 
Gur was a true volunteer at heart. He was a committed and dedicated grassroots leader. As his best friend and fellow lawyer Jagjit Singh Gill puts it, “Gur had the uncanny ability to connect with all kinds of people whatever their status, race, creed or background and it therefore, came as no surprise that he excelled in community work.”  Gur had been active in the grassroots for many years. He was most recently appointed Vice-Chairman of the Bukit Timah Community Club Management Committee, and Chairman of the Community Emergency & Engagement Committee and Inter-Racial and Religious Confidence Circle. He was also the Immediate Past Chairman of the Bukit Timah Zone 3 Residents’ Committee. All this was in addition to his work as Chairman of sub-committees under the Holland-Bukit Panjang Town Council and the South West Community Development Council.
He had a “larger than life” personality and sacrificed a great amount of his time to organise events for the less privileged. Indeed, Gur was a person who rarely said “no” to a request. His selfless service and contributions to the community were recognised when he was the youngest ever recipient of the Bintang Bakti Masyarakat (“BBM”) award recently. Always reasonable and understanding, he would try to be accommodating and end up with many people’s burdens on his shoulders, perhaps because his shoulders were broad enough and his heart big enough. His relentless drive to fulfill his responsibilities in the different facets of his life was truly remarkable and outstanding.
Among those in the legal fraternity, Lau Teik Soon (“Lau”) regarded Gur as his closest legal colleague and dependable partner. To him, Gur was a proficient advocate in practice and with strengths in litigation and negotiations. Lau knew Gur wanted to acquire further legal knowledge and in August 2010, Gur was admitted into the Master of Laws programme at the University of London. Lau and Gur often discussed professional and personal issues and what impressed Lau about Gur was his commitment not only to the legal profession but also his residents as well as the Sikh community. In particular, Lau felt strongly Gur’s concern for the Sikh community and what he could do to promote harmony and unity among them.
Many adjectives have been used to describe Gur: kind, helpful, generous, friendly, approachable, reasonable, always smiling, astute, caring, reliable, inspiring, charming, handsome.
Gur was our Angel here on earth and mere words cannot express how much we miss him. We can only find comfort in the fact that he had lived his life well and true to himself, more so than most men would in their lifetime. Gur has touched the hearts of many and left an indelible mark on all of us.
Gur was a wonderful and loving husband, father and son. The English language does not contain words that can adequately pay enough approbation to someone like him. We, his family and friends agree that his legacy was defined by his actions that will last for eternity, where even words engraved on stone will fade away with time. His legacy will forever keep his memory alive.
Gur’s abrupt passing reminds us constantly of the frailty of life. What he has taught us is that what matters most is how one leads and lives his or her life. For him, he lived a full, rich, respectable and impactful life, albeit a short one. He will forever be remembered and loved by all who knew him. He has shown us that with hard work and determination, there is nothing that one cannot achieve. As a friend said, “May we all etch the footprints of the impact of this life onto our living community memory”.
We have also learnt from losing him that transcending loss means aligning with a higher purpose and that all things happen for a reason even when they make no sense at all.
My dearest, you have left me too soon. You were my beloved and my best friend, my one true love. How I miss our special talks and all the fun things we used to do.
I was your pillar of strength as you would always say, but to me you were my inspiration. I have realised that I am not that strong as I was when you were beside me. You have left shoes that are too big for me to fill but I promise to do my best as you always taught me to be my very best in all that I do. 
Gur, I can never say goodbye to you because I could never bear the pain. Instead I shall say I love you until we meet again. In my heart, I know it is God’s heavenly plan to bring us together only to part. I am thankful that I was a part of you and I draw strength everyday knowing that one day we will meet again, with you waiting to welcome me at heaven’s door with open arms to embrace me once more.
My dearest, our lovely children and I dedicate this in your memory; rest in eternal peace.  
A thousand times we needed you
A thousand times we cried
If love alone could have saved you
You never would have died
A heart of gold stopped beating
Two twinkling eyes closed to rest
God broke our hearts to prove he only took the best
My dearest, never a day goes by that you’re not in our heart and in our soul.
Good bye Daddy dearest, you’re finally home.

 Rajvant Kaur
 Lau & Gur